Happily Ever After

Check out the blog I wrote for Girls of Grace. See the original post here: http://www.girlsofgrace.com/content/happily-ever-after-penny-syndrome

“Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Love does not demand its own way. Love is not irritable and it keeps no record of when it has been wronged. It is never glad about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” – 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Have you ever watched a chick flick and thought: that is a great story, I want that. We’ve all thought that once or twice if not multiple times. Why? Because we all want the perfect love story. We invest our time and love into relationships and find ourselves disappointed over and over again because it didn’t live up to our expectations.

My friend, Emily, says that this is because chick flicks are the female version of pornography. We indulge in this romanticized feeling of prince charming and these movies give us unrealistic expectations on relationships. We convince ourselves of this because living in a fairy tale world seems so much safer than reality.

You see, none of us are immune to the penny syndrome. We can live our lives as godly as we can and guard our hearts as securely as possible, but at any moment that security can disappear and we hand out our hearts as if they were worth nothing more than spare change.

Here’s my question: Who says we need to care? Where in the guidebook to love does it say we are defined by a guy, a “prince charming”?

How many times have you met an engaged or married couple and asked for their story? If you’re like me, then you love the story. The “when did you know” defining moment that we all secretly hope we can one day experience for ourselves.

Now, how many times have you heard the story go like this:

Well he never responded to my text messages or phone calls and only talked to me on his terms when he felt like it. When he wanted to hang out we would have a great time but then I wouldn’t hear from him again for weeks. Eventually he decided that he liked me and now we’re happily married.


He wasn’t very nice in the beginning, always cheating on me and ditching me when we had plans. I remember this one time crying so hard I thought I was going to die. That’s when he stopped calling me for no reason whatsoever. But then he did again! And I took him back! And look how happy we are!

Okay, maybe that’s a bit of an exaggeration, but my point is, you NEVER hear that kind of story from the ridiculously gross, happy couple you hope you one day will be. That’s because when it’s your story – and I mean your very own, sweet, lovey-dovey, nauseating chick-flick-esque story – it’s not going to be like that.

It’s not going to be like every other story you’ve experienced so far of:

The boy who didn’t call
The boy who only texts you when he feels like it
The boy who only wants to have sex with you
The boy who is embarrassed of you around his friends

…I could go on and on. You could probably add a few to this list yourself.

We all deserve to tell a great story and it’s time we stopped settling just because we want a story to tell. So ask yourself, what kind of story do you really want?

And here’s the truth: You deserve an amazing story.


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